Spending a few days agonizing while praying about this new post led me back to my mission for the year, "Authenticity."
Last Friday, as I led the morning prayer (like I do every morning), I was left feeling annoyed and regretful in the decision I made to married a man that views spending time with God as something we are supposed to do, but no one really does.
As he said, "hurry up, make the prayer short," I was even more irritated with the situation. My drive to work was filled with questions for God.
1. Why is my husband not the leader of the home?
2. How can I make him more of a spiritual person?
3. Will the future of our family be affected by his lack of dependence on you?
I really thought God would feel my pain and frustration (and honestly feel sorry for me) instead I felt him say,
"Why do you think he is not a spiritual leader?"
I started to name the list of things, such as him not praying over the family in the morning and not spending hours a week reading his Bible etc. I went on talking and referred to the scriptures. Specifically:
As I continued talking, a sense of conviction started to come over me. From my decades of walking with God I knew this meant, my thought process was not in line with his thoughts. It took everything for me to do a 180 with my thoughts but I know at this point it was required. I then reflected on the years my husband and I spent together and remembered two things that distinctively stood out to me and confirmed he was not only a follower of Christ but the head of the home.
1. When my one year old had a seizure.
I was in a bad place watching my 1 year old in the hospital, powerless and listless. At that point my husband gave me a big hug and said, "God will take care of him, He promised.” My son is now doing better than ever despite the bad reports.
He started pre-K yesterday J
2. When I wanted to give up on singing.
I love singing but got tired of the politics and the negativity from others in the body of Christ. My husband stated, "If you feel God doesn't want you to sing any more you can stop, but I feel as though, God is calling you to reach others with your voice."
Since then I have gone on to record 5 songs and now singing around the country (deloracares.com) and leading praise and worship at a church of over 3, 000 members.
After reminiscing on my husband’s past track record, I then asked God to teach me how to help my husband lead and here are the three (3) things:
1. Encourage him to lead: Instead of praying every morning encourage him to pray every other morning.
2. Before making life altering decisions (saving, spending, choosing a college fund), ask for his input.
3. Pray: Pray that God lays on his heart the importance and responsibility of a leader in the home.
Our husband’s may not always lead in the way we want them to but through prayer, God will continue to mold them into the man he created for our households!
Please leave any other suggestions you may have for me and others.
I look forward to linking up this week.